Raad The Hero - Healing with Happiness

It was Raad (right) who kept insisting that Ahmad (left) pose for the camera, I took the shots in low light, hiding the severity of the facial injuries. Ahmad was pleased.

Raad and Ahmed outside the physiotherapy room at Kaser Zedha Hotel, where MSF is hosting over 40 victims of war and their companions, often close family relatives. MSF doctors perform the operations at the Red Crescent Hospital. Raad has already had 4 operations on his hands and is waiting for his hand to heal before continuing with the reconstructive surgeries.

Raad and Ahmed having fun posing for photos. These are two great guys, we joked, imagined them in Canada, laughed til we cried.

A car exploded in a busy part of Kirkuk. Raad Sahad a tailor by profession ran to help, that’s when the second explosion occurred. Raad suffered severe burned on his face, arms and hands. He is now sponsored by MSF and has lived in the Kaser Zedh Hotel since August 9, 2007. He has had 4 operations and with a laugh tells me is now has moment in his hands.

Raad is one of the most remarkable people I have met during my stay in Amman. Though he suffered a huge tragedy he keeps everyone at the Hotel laughing. He is optimistic that he will be able to hold scissors again, to make clothes, to start a business, to do anything he wants, as soon as he gets full movement in his hands.

Raads’ close friend at the Hotel is 22 year old Ahmad Hukala. Ahmad suffered severe burns in an explosion in a mosque in Mosul. When I see Ahmad I see the pain and longing of a young man to have a normal life, to visit friends, to have girlfriends, to get married. Ahmad unlike Raad is embarrassed about the way he looks, he envies his friend Raads long thick hair. When I see Ahmad alone he is quiet, sullen and depressed. Then along comes Raad and Ahmad is at least for the moment transformed into a smiling joking young man enjoying talking with a good friend.

Bomb at Al Mustansiriya University in Baghdad

“My hopes are to walk, continue my studies, get married and have a future.”


The prosthetic hand of Hasanen Basim Khudier.

Hasanen Basim Khudier puts on his prosthetic hand during a trauma session with resident MSF phychiatrist Yousef.

In 2004 Hasanen Basim Khudier was a 21 year old a mechanical engineer student at Al Mustansiyra University in Baghdad. He was in the hallway of the university when a Katusha rocket hit. From the explosion he lost the muscles in his left thigh, 20cm of bone from his left shin, and 4 fingers from his right hand. He saw his best friends head explode.

He was taken by ambulance to a hospital, but there was no treatment, facilities or medicines available. The doctors did what they could and sent him home. Eventually he was fitted with a prosthetic hand. In 2005 Hasanen raised US $10,000 from private donors to come to Amman for reconstructive bone surgery. The operation failed.

He is now sponsored by MSF and has had several operations, including bone transplants. To straighten his leg the doctors have attached a platinum external brace. They are waiting to see if the bone will develop, it’s a slow process, but Hasanen is determined to keep his leg and eventually walk again.

Waiting, waiting, waiting

“There were many threats and terror by the Muslims against the Sabeans, but it was hidden, no one talked about it, we were all scared,” said Amir Hadar of the situation of Sabeans in Iraq during the reign of Saddam Hussein.

Amir, his mother and 2 sisters show their UNHCR refugee status.

In 2000, Amir a single man, now living with his mother and 2 sisters in Amman worked as a cameraman for a TV station owned by Oday the much-feared son of Saddam. Odays’ guards would tease and threaten Amir making his life miserable, “it was like a sport for them,” said Amir of his ordeal. “I couldn’t take it anymore, so in 2001 I fled to Jordan and applied for asylum.”

Amirs’ father died (a natural death) in Iraq in 2003 leaving Amirs mother and 2 sisters to take care of themselves and the huge home which had been in the family for generations. Then came the threats. It got worse and worse until one night masked men broke into their home, pointed a gun at the eldest sister and the mother and told them to get out or they would kidnap them. The 3 women left as soon as they could get a passport taking nothing but a bag with them to Amman.

“ We cannot go forward and cannot go backwards, we are in a prison,” said the sister of Amir.

Savings gone

"I used to be so rich now see how far I have fallen," says Ali Halif a goldsmith from Iraq now living in Amman, Jordan.

Ali Halif shows his identity card which gives his profession as goldsmith. Ali Halif is extremely bitter about his situation. He never planned to stay in Jordan for going on 8 years.

The family of Ali Halif in their courtyard.

The courtyard where Ali Halif spends his time building a garden.

Ali Halif had a flourishing business in Diyala during the reign of Saddam Husseins Baath Party. Like many in the Sabean community, he is a gold smith and made his living by importing and exporting gold. Many though not all of the Sabeans’ I interviewed told me they were persecuted because of their religion, telling me that if a Muslim kills a Sabean he will go to paradise.

Ali Halif tells me his fear and intimidation began in 2001 when his sons, at the time 3 and 7 years old, were out playing during the Shia holy celebration of Hassen al Hussain a
To honor this day Shia families prepare huge plates of traditional foods, which they share amongst each other. Ali Halifs’ sons were curious and looked at the food, for this sacrilegious act they were caught by teenage boys who said they had polluted their food and therefore no Shia could eat it. The teenage boys said they would teach these Sabeans a lesson and poured boiling hot water on the sons of Ali Halif, scarring them for life.

Ali took the boys to a hospital, but the staff at the hospital said they would not treat them unless they filed a police report. Ali then took the boys to the police gave a report, on the way back to the hospital Shias working with Saddam Hussein told them to retract the statement. Ali then took his sons to his relative, a doctor. Five months later the police took the oldest son to jail for 5 days. Shia strongmen kept coming to his business demanding money. He tells me he had no protection from the police or government so he sold all of his assets and escaped with his family to Jordan in 2001.

At that time the Halif family was still rich, and able to afford a good life in Jordan. I asked him why he did not start a business in Jordan at the time when he had money to invest. He told me that when things calmed down or even during the first year of the War in Iraq he planned to go back to Iraq. He also told me he had no plans to seek asylum or refugee status. He has relatives who were also in Jordan during 2001-2003, relatives he helped financially, relatives who sought and were accepted to third countries as asylum seekers.

Finally in 2004 realizing there was no future for him in Jordan or Iraq, the Halif family filed with the UNHCR as refugees. They continue to wait for resettlement to a third country.

Ali Halif was visibly angry when he told that just this week (July 29, 2008), he called the UNHCR to inquire of his status. According to Ali, the worker told him not to call again because he is annoying them and if he calls again they will refuse to resettle him.

Civilian causalities, or shall we just call them mistakes.

“The Americans burst into our house pointed a gun at my 3 year old daughters head and shot her.”

"AH" a 23 years old double amputee sits in her wheelchair in her bedroom at the Zeda Hotel in Amman, Jordan. She is sponsored by MSF and is receiving prosthetic therapy.

I met AH who is a double amputee at the Zeda Hotel, she is sponsored by MSF and is receiving prosthetic treatment. AH wanted desperately to tell me her story but her father did not want her to go through this again. He told me that their story has been published many times, on TV and nothing has ever come of it, they have received no compensation or justice. AH would not give up and finally we got her fathers consent.

This is horrifying incident took place at noon in 2004 in Ambar. The American Marines had surrounded their neighborhood, the loudspeakers telling the residents not to come out of their homes. Amals family, her father, mother, 3 sisters, 2 brothers and baby girl were sitting in the living room eating lunch. They saw a tank in their backyard, it started to shoot at their home. Then 2 soldiers burst into their home, (both in their early 30’s which shows that these were not young 20 year old inexperienced soldiers, one white, one black.) They were only 2 meters away when they shot Amals daughter in the head.

“I was holding her in my arms, her head burst open and even parts hit the ceiling, then the soldiers threw 2 grenades and left,” says Amal, her eyes blank.

Suddenly, jeeps, tanks, and a helicopter surrounded their home. The family went to the kitchen, the father took his white scarf and through the opened window waved it to the helicopter above. He said it was so close he could see the soldiers inside. It made no difference, 2 missiles were shot and fell near the kitchen doorway. “AH” mother and 9-year-old sister were killed. The rest of the “living” family members were seriously injured, one brother sustained 2 broken and smashed legs, AH lost both her legs, miraculously only the father sustained minimal injuries. Alone AH’s father began moving his families’ bodies out of the house.
Many American Marines entered the house again, they saw the dead bodies and put them in black bags, put the wounded into the helicopter and took them to the medical base. Then they threw grenades and bombed the house to the ground. They said it was a case of misinformation, the official army response was, “it was a mistake, an accident.” In fact it was another cover-up, just like in Haditha. But at least those soldiers were charged, the case became known and maybe even the family members who survived were compensated. For this family there has not been any justice whatsoever.

For the next years AH’s father has sought compensation from the Americans, they have received nothing. “We live only day by day, we can not plan anything for the future, now we want only treatment, we have given up on the Americans, only MSF have helped us,” says the father of AH. He went on to tell me what he said to an American General he met at the American medical base.

“It would be an honor to kill you. If an Iraqi came to America and an entire family of civilians, Bush himself would hold the gun and shoot him.”

Another husband disappears

Wafa'a Taleb Faleh shows her UNHCR refugee papers in the small hallway of her apartment which she uses as the salon to greet guests. She is raising her 2 sons alone, her husband went to work one day and never returned. His body was never found, she has no idea what happened to him.

Wafa'a shows the ID of her husband who worked as a translator for one of the military contractors like Blackwater.

Wafa'a in the kitchen, a strong and independent woman who must work to support her 2 sons, she often suffers from severe depression and anxiety.

In 2005 Wafa’a Taleb Faleh worked with CARITAS helping people and the NEW IRAQ CHARITABLE SOCIETY showing dignitaries around Iraq. Her husband was a translator for one of the western contractors like Blackwater, (she refused to tell me which one.) Her husband was a Christian but converted to Islam in order to marry her. Wafa’ah and her husband were threatened because they worked for “the enemy as well as for being a Christian, those who threatened them would not believe they were Muslim.

On July 11, 2005 Wafa’as’ husband left the house, he never came back, his body was never found. Wafa’a suffers from severe depression in Amman, though does all she can to raise her 2 sons. She tells me she is exhausted by the stress and pressure of working illegally as a waitress for wedding parties in hotels where she earns 5 JD a night. She is sickened by the way the men at these events who call her bitch, whore and humiliate her treat her.

“We have no control over our lives, we can’t talk, we can’t complain, we can’t go to the police to report our mistreatment by people, by our neighbors. My kids are hit and beaten by the Palestinians and Jordanians, they call them names and intimidate them all the time. I just want to have the right to work, to have a home, to have some control over my life, to educate my kids. I don’t care about being rich or even going to America or wherever, I just want to be settled somewhere. I can’t go back to Iraq, they will kill me, and then what will happen to my sons,” says Wafa’a of her situation in Amman, Jordan.

She gets 140 JD from charity groups, her rent is 100 JD, she earns about 180-190 JD a month working illegally. Wafa’a went to the UNHCR to complain about her situation, they told her, “we are the UN, you can wait or you can go back to Iraq.”

*** Personal Notes:

I have listened to complaints concerning the UNHCR from almost every family I have interviewed. They tell me of rich Iraqis who were ‘invited’ to leave Iraq for America, Australia, Canada, but some of them refused saying they have a good business in Amman and don’t want to leave. In one case, so the rumor goes, the UNHCR representative drove to the rich families home with papers and full permission to leave, which the rich family refused. Another case is of a rich Iraqi whose sons are studying in Universities in America. I have tried to interview the rich families here, but to date they have all refused. Rumors, innuendos, who knows what the truth is? Each family feels their case is more important and compelling than the rest and deserve a better life, a settled life anywhere, most don’t care, as long as they can work, their children get an education, and they can, like Wafa’a said, have some control over their lives. My observations are that the Iraqis are becoming more and more disillusioned with the UNHCR yet feel helpless to plead their cases or seek legal council.

Today “M” my fixer here in Amman, told me that he was personally propositioned from one of the UNHCR caseworkers asking for US $10,000 who said he will be able to forward his case. “M” with a bemused smile said, “and how am I going to get $10,000?”

Mafia Militia a Profitable Business in Post War Iraq.

Kafah Ata a Sabean from Iraq and her 3 sons in their apartment in Amman, Jordan. Kafahs' husband was a personal bodyguard for Saddam Hussein and his son Oday. Photos of Saddam Hussein take center stage on their living room wall. They remain faithful to Saddam saying the chaos that is in Iraq now would never have happened if Saddam was in power.

The youngest son of Kafah looks out the window, he is often too afraid to go out and play with the neighborhood kids, Palestinian or Jordanian, because they hit him and call him names.

Kafah praying in her home.

“In my family they kidnapped my husband “M”, nephew, uncle, brother-in-law, shot and killed my aunt and her son,” said Kafah Ata of why she and her family are in Jordan waiting to be resettled. “In 2004 we paid US $2000 for my husband, we came to Jordan right after. My husband was a paramedic in the Iran war, the Gulf war, and this war, he was honored with 12 medals. When there was no war, my husband was a personal bodyguard for Saddam and his son Oday. He saw Saddam or Oday almost everyday, they were good to him, Saddam was like a father.”

The people who worked with Saddam were given a card which stated that they were a friend of Saddam and therefore untouchable. The family is Sabean, were allowed to go to church, pray as they wanted, and had no problems with other religious or ethnic groups in Iraq. Sometime in 2003 “M” was sitting in his office when he got a letter, which read, ‘either you convert to Islam or we will kill you.’ “We all stayed in our house in Baghdad but kept hearing news of friends being killed, so we left for Dialla,” said Kafah. “In Dialla, my husband had a business selling police dogs. After one year in Dialla we heard from friends that it was safe to return to Baghdad - so we went back.”

“M” was kidnapped shortly after their return. They don’t know who kidnapped him; the men were masked just one of the hundreds of Mafia Militias doing business by kidnapping people. They called “M’s” brother, the sound of M’s screams while being tortured in the background, and told him to pay 2000 American dollars or they would kill “M”. The family paid the ransom and “M” was released.

This was not the case for Kafahs nephew, uncle, aunt or brother-in-law all of whom were kidnapped and killed or shot in the attempt of being kidnapped. “Now there is no law, no order, no justice, no nothing, its uncontrolled,” says Kafah of the situation in Iraq. “They kidnapped my nephew at the university when he was walking on the road. We paid the money, but he never came back. My uncle, we also paid the money, then our neighbors called us saying to come quickly. We found my uncle dead on the street. My brother-in-law was kidnapped from his shop, the kidnappers phoned us and demanded 70,000 American dollars! They told us to throw the money over the bridge and don’t worry he will come back. That was a year and a half ago, we never found his body. In the beginning the Mafia Militias asked for 1000 or 2000 US dollars, like with my husband, then they got more and more successful and started demanding more and more money. So now if you are from a rich family you pay a lot of money and they kill them anyway, so tell me where is the democracy, the justice, the security the Americans promised,” asked Kafah looking visibly upset.

In Amman though they live the waiting game at least they are safe, they can sleep without the fear of being kidnapped, tortured, raped or whatever else the Mafia militias are doing to the people of Iraq.

Kafah wanted to say this to those of you reading her story,” I know the world is not happy because of what happens in Iraq. I know you support us, but we get nothing. You think we are okay because you support us be we aren’t. Iran is taking Iraq because they want the oil and to get revenge for the Iran/Iraq war. The government is speaking Farsi, not Arabic. Look at Muhktar Al Sadr, he even changed his name to an Iranian name.”

Alone and Six Months Pregnant with Twins

Iraqi refugee Shahar Hussein Mehdi shows the food she is able to make on a budget of 20 JD a month.

Sharah and her 13 old daughter. They are alone in their apartment in Amman. Her husband was caught working and was deported in April 2008.

Sahar is 6 months pregnant with twins, she receives medical treatment from CARITAS and some help from CARE. She will be needing a C-section and must rely on neighbors to help her after giving birth. Her husband is in Iraq.

In Iraq Sahar Hussein Mehdi and her husband were very poor but were able scrape enough money together to rent an unremarkable home in Baghdad. After the fall of Saddam Husseins’ Baath party in 2003, their landlord came threatening them with eviction if they didn’t pay more rent. The couple said they have a contract for their home and wouldn’t leave. A few days later the landlord came back, pulled out a gun and shot. The bullet hit Sahar in the arm, shortly after they left for Amman to claim refugee status.

In 2007 Sahar gave birth to her daughter in Amman. In April 2008 her husband was caught working and deported to Iraq. Sahar is 6 months pregnant with twins. She lives alone in a small apartment in Jabal Hussein. She receives 80 JD from CARE, 60 JD she spends on rent, the rest on food. CARE also provides her with 3 diaper packages a month. “Thank God,” explains Sahar, “some of my neighbors help me when they can. But I am scared because I will have to have a cesarean section and who will look after my daughter or me.”

Sahar went to Lawyer Yara at UNHCR where she was told that she will soon be accepted in the resettlement program and if her husband can make it to Syria she can pick him up on her way. (personally I question these facts, but it does give Sahar hope and that I hope will enable her calmness in the last months of her pregnancy.) Sahar must wait til she gives birth to her twins (a boy and a girl), before she is able to travel, but it looks like she may get a chance for a new life…somewhere….inshallah.